I HAVE NEVER…NEVER EVER IN MY LIFE SLEPT WITH A MAN FOR MONEY, Linda Ikeji writes young LADIES. She is truely an inspiration.

My name is Linda Ikeji. I'm a blogger. I'm 35 years old and I have never...never ever in my life slept with a man for money. Not only have I never done it, I have never even considered it...and here I am with a house that cost me over half a billion naira.

Listen, you are beautiful and you are stronger than you know. There's absolutely nothing you can't achieve if you set your mind to it, put your heart and soul into it.
Up until five years ago, I was a struggling entrepreneur. I can't tell you how many offices in this Lagos I sat in for hours waiting to see people who could support my business...but most times, I never passed the reception area. But I never gave up and I never stopped believing and here I am today.

You too can be this..you can be better than this. No dream is too big, no dream is too small, no mountain is too high...it's all in your mind. It's all up to you. If you believe in you, in your God who is guiding you, then the sky is your starting point.

Please stop waiting around for a man to give to you...to put food on your table and put clothes on your back. I promise you, you can do it for yourself. Start thinking big, believe in yourself, be creative and start working. Realize that your dreams are valid...and nobody will make your dreams come true except you. Find what you are good at. Find something that you are passionate about. Work hard at it. Be consistent. Be patient. Start young. Even if you're not young, it's never too late!

I have been hustling since I left secondary school..started modeling before I entered university in 1998. Was running a modeling agency even while I was a student and made it a full time business after I left university. I never doubted that I would succeed one day, because I was determined. And please do not think this happened over night. I've been blogging since 2006...November this year will make it exactly 9 years. God, consistency and hard work brought me here today.

Unfortunately, a lot of our young girls aren't patient and some are lazy, they want it quick and fast but it doesn't work like that. Success takes time - takes hard work - takes passion - takes consistency - but more than anything else, it takes the Grace of God.

I was a 30 year old broke woman and on my birthday, a very sad and depressed me turned to God and begged him. I told Him you promised me, when will You fulfill Your promise? Am I not Your child? Have I not lived according to Your teachings? When will You bless me? Please God help me...and with tears in my eyes, I begged Him. I cried and I begged and I begged and I begged. A few months later my life changed. Never underestimate God's love for you and the power of prayer.

And never stop working. Listen, I make enough money to hire so many people to work on this blog while I go do other things and enjoy myself...but I don't do that. I'm up while some of you are sleeping, and already blogging before some of you wake up. I don't take this for granted. I know to stay on top, I have to constantly work and nobody will be as dedicated as I am because this is not their own thing. It's mine and I have to keep feeding it. So I'm constantly here!

Young ladies, I promise you...you too can do this. You don't need to spread your legs for any bladdy man - because of how much? N200k? That's how much my shoes cost - so why should you give up your body for that? Your sacred body? God's temple? N200k that you can make in a week or even in a day if you pursue your dreams and still have your dignity intact? You think people don't see that you're messing around with all dem old married men and talking about it? Think ladies, think! When next a man propositions you...tell him to get lost, that you will get yours yourself! Abi, aren't you a woman? You know what they say about women? "A woman is like a tea bag, you never know how strong she is until she gets in hot water.". You are so strong, you don't even know!

Also, if you want God to bless you, you have to have a clean heart. All these backbiting, hating on others, trying to bring people down with hateful words/actions etc - God doesn't like ugly. He has over 6 billion people to look after and you think he will pay extra attention to you if your heart is ugly? Wish people well, help people when you can. Be good to others. But more than anything else be good to yourself. Believe in yourself. It's very easy to give in to feelings of self-doubt and back down when things get tough, but you have to know that God will not give you anything you can't handle.

I swear to you, you are underestimating yourself. If you know the power that you have inside. If you know the things that you are capable of. If you know how far you can go...how high you can reach but you are holding yourself back because you're afraid of failing, because you don't think you have it in you. If only you know that you're stronger than you think. You are so powerful, you don't even know it. I'm not more special than you are. I don't have two heads. We serve the same God. Why can't you succeed? Think ladies, think.

Like Barack Obama's sister said, poverty is not an excuse! I used to sell/market beer at Sheraton hotel, Lagos when I was in university for N1,000 a day. I once lived on 'puff puff' and garri for weeks in UNILAG and I was supposedly a top model but nobody knew what I was going through.

Trust me, I knew poverty. Did you know I lived in Idi-oro, Mushin for 15 years? Up until when I was 25? Did you live in Mushin? Eh, so what's your excuse? I can't even say some things here for my family's privacy but here I am today because I never doubted myself and I never allowed all the doubters to distract me. I was focused. I was determined. I worked hard and I knew the God I served won't let me down. The road was long, sometimes very frustrating and painful but look at me now. God did it because he saw that I was willing!

"Because I am a woman, I must make unusual efforts to succeed. If I fail, no one will say, “She doesn’t have what it takes.” They will say, “Women don’t have what it takes.”

Please believe in yourself and watch God use you to set as an example for others.

May all your dreams come true!

Kisses.

Oh by the way (addressing the argument I read online this weekend) I don't do anything else. I blog from 4am till midnight, where do I have time to do anything else? When God wants to bless you, He will bless you...even if you're selling toothpick.

Cheers!

Shell and Lukoil Lubricants Road activation held in Lagos, Nigeria

Jollypearls Event planners and Decor: 10 Tips to enjoy your wedding dayYour wedding day...

Jollypearls Event planners and Decor:
10 Tips to enjoy your wedding dayYour wedding day...: 10 Tips to enjoy your wedding day Your wedding day should be one of the happiest days of your life. However, most brides spend the day s...

10 Tips to enjoy your wedding day

Your wedding day should be one of the happiest days of your life. However, most brides spend the day stressed out and anxious. Here are a few tips to help you have fun and enjoy your special day because after all, its all about you:

1- Don't expect "perfect"- Expecting perfection is a sure way to suffer a mental breakdown because what is perfect to you might not be what is perfect to anyone else. Expect things to be wonderful and don't worry about the little things , everything will work out.

2- Plan! Plan!! Plan!!!Make sure everything is taken care of by the day before your wedding. All deliverable and decorating tasks should be taken care of. Don't complicate your day by trying to do much on that day.

3- Your clothing should be comfortable and appropriate for your environment. make sure your dress let's you breathe. Check and make sure that the air-conditions/fans at the reception venue work.

4- Choose shoes that will let you stand and walk comfortably and make sure you have walked around in them before. If you must have them stretched so that you do not blemish your day with blisters.

5- Avoid eating heavy meals, gassy or acidic foods and drinking alcohol the night before to avoid discomforts.Do make sure you eat something before your wedding and drink plenty of water.

6- Avoid heavy perfumes. They can overcome your senses and make you feel nauseous, they can also attract insects if outdoors.

7- Relaxing is most important. Before walking down the aisle, you may find that a short 'loosening up' or stretching is in order. Shake your arms and legs and do a few head and neck rolls. You may look funny but it does help. Don't lock your knees while standing, stand with your legs slightly apart with knees relaxed and periodically wriggle you toes. If you feel faint, take advantage of prayers. Bend your head and breath slowly, deeply inhaling through your nose and exhaling from your mouth to a slow mental count. Lean on your fiance if you must.

8- Make all final payments ahead of time, its really not nice writing cheques during your reception. If not paid the week before, give final payments to your co-ordinator, best man or some other designated individual in labelled envelops.

9- Expect extra guest. If you have a seating plan, have a plan for extra seats. Setting up extra tables while guests stand in waiting can be avoided with a few extra seats.

10- If you have contracted with a team of reputable wedding professional, they have done many more weddings than you have. Trust your wedding professional and allow them do their jobs. Now if you have hired your future brother-in-law's cousin's friend- well you get what you pay for.

There is little sense in spending a lot of money and time planning a wedding and being so stressed out on the day that you don not enjoy or remember it. You never get a second chance (and you really do not want one) so make it worth while

Intimate tips for women

1- Be submissive to your husband. Don't resist him or rebel against him.
2- Demonstrate your faith through your lifestyle. Don't preach.
3- Be loyal to your husband in every way.
4- Take care to remain attractive on the outside.
5- Develop a quiet and gentle spirit that is inwardly attractive.
6- Develop a feminine and serene style to your life.
7- A woman should never criticize or attack her husband, rather than attack him respect and encourage him.
8- When men are not proud of what they see in their wives they become more vulnerable to having an affair. Your husband wants to be proud that you are by his side whether at home or in public. Pay attention to how you look for your husband.

Ladies alert - Confession of how how a married man met on BBM s*xually abused and almost killed her.. A MUST READ

I am a graduate and currently serving in Kaduna. I could have runced it, but I needed somewhere to clear my head and forget about my ugly encounter. Here is my story. I happened to have a married man as a contact on my bbm. He had been asking me out for over six months and I refused to date him. As time went on, he invited me clubbing with him when his wife was outside the country, and I went with him all night. We spent most of the night at Swe bar, Lagos. I also met his clique of friends, married as well with their various mistresses. We had ‘mad’ fun. After all the clubbing and drinking, he lodged me in a hotel somewhere in Obalende. I felt sort of safe with him. We did not have se’x, but he made sweet love to me and touched me in places I had never ever imagined. He kissed me passionately but guess what? He did not have se’x with me. We did all sorts but there was no penetration. So, to an extent, I trusted he was a good person to be around with. I did not know that it was all part of the plan. He gave me N10,000 and put me in a cab to go home the next morning. We kept talking and chatting and sending nak’ed pictures to each other and he told me naughty things of how he wanted to whisper things in my ear, I blushed. We didn’t see for two weeks and that was because his wife just came back from Turkey. One faithful evening, he pinged me that he was organising a beach party/boat cruise and that he would love for me to be his date and that he wanted to open a bbm chat, as a medium for his friends and my friends to interact. I was excited about it, I just wanted to have fun. I was able to get five of my very hot friends. The BBM group opened and we got chatting. I also realise that majority of them were married and working in reputable firms. It was fun and we didn’t mind if they were married, we just wanted to have fun, as well as some other girls apart from my friends in the group. We chatted exclusively, sent pictures to the BBM group to introduce ourselves, and we had opened group conversations pending the beach party. And as excited as we were, we went shopping for nice se’xy beach wears. The D-day finally came, we all assembled at the Lagos Island Boat Club. I was wowed because it was a high class party. We were cruising in a boat loaded with goodies drinks and hot babes, and as well ‘MARRIED MEN’. I did not care, I just said in my mind that I would not roll with married men anymore after this, that for now, all I wanted to do was to catch some fun. After all, I wasn’t paying bills. We got there, it was a private beach resort. Most of the beach facilities I got to see there were owned by multinational companies. We got out of the boat, and went to where we were partying. It was a duplex made with wood. It was a very nice setting. I felt comfortable because it even had a fence around it separating it from other beach houses around. So, there was privacy and of course bouncers (heavy looking guys) guarding the place. I said to myself, this must be heaven, I must be dreaming. Anyways, we felt free with each other because we had been chatting. It was 5:30pm and the party just started. We had drinks flowing from the private bar tender which happens to be owned by one of the men in the group. Reality struck when I realised that I was feeling dizzy and feeling really funny and light headed. Not only me, but other girls around me too noticed there was something strange about it. I was also feeling Hot as hell! I had been drugged. They monitored us and when they knew the drug had really gone deep into our system, they moved us up into the main beach house. I could still see faces, but was too weak and Hot to react. Mr B, the man who took me clubbing, carried me in his hands like a sacrifice and put me down on the floor just as other men also did with their girls. We were eight in numbers; 8 girls, 8 guys, and they all stri*ped us down and had se’x with us. I enjoyed it a bit because I was Hot. It was a mixed feeling because I cried, I moaned, but I did not know how many times he came into me. He pounded me hard. I was dizzy, but he grabbed me with force. All I could notice was the wedding ring on his finger. I thought of how wicked and miserable some married can be. How inhuman and heartless they could be. All of them took turns in switching partners and slept with all of us. I passed out. That was the last thing I could remember. I felt water poured on me. I noticed all the other girls around me too were half naked and some stark naked. We spent the night at the beach, but the men were no where to be found. I looked round me and all I could see was packs of used condoms. I ran to pick my cloths and possibly raise an alarm. I got dressed, found my phone with an envelope. It contained N16,000 and a note asking us to take N2000 each for transport. Tears of anger and rage filled my eyes and the girls around me as well. “We were drugged and used like tissue paper. I grabbed my phone and noticed a ping came in. I checked my phone and I noticed the BBM group had been deleted, and a message via BBM from MR B came in. He threatened me that if I say a word to anyone, I would regret it. I told him he was a bastard, and he said try it. A picture came in, several pictures. In fact, they were pictures of us being nak’ed on the floor. Pictures of the humiliating us but they blurred the faces of the men. In total, I got 20 pictures. I was not myself for a month. I went back to school, I had no one to talk to. The rest of the semester was hell for me. My CGPA dropped drastically. It was the worst out of the worst result I ever had. Till today, my friends and I have not discussed this with anyone, but all I could do when I heard of Cynthia’s story was to narrate my own ordeal anonymously and spread the news, the word, and pray they (ladies who do runs) see it and changed their ways. I am now born again. I have given my life to Christ. I fear men so much that I cannot even move close to them. I still have nightmares, but with time, God will strengthen me and I will move on. My advice to single ladies out there is, do not be desperate for fun. Pray to God to open your eyes of understanding, and pray hard. He who kneels before God will stand before kings and queens. To all married women, pray hard to God to intervene in your marriages and turn your husbands from bad habits and bad friends. As for me, I do not think I ever want to get married or date a man again. That chapter has been closed for good in my life. Please, do not ignore my mail. Please post it. There are a lot of things we ladies need to learn. Please post it on your blog and save a soul. It could be your friend, sister, cousin, neighbor. God bless you as you pass it on. To all readers, I do not care if you insult me or rain abuses at me. My job is to share this encounter with you and save you from any mishap. God bless you all. Amen.