WHAT A HUSBAND NEEDS FROM A WIFE IS NEVER SEX.
By: B.I.C. Abeiku Okai.

Sex is an important element in marriage and until there is sexual intercourse between a husband and a wife, the marriage is not yet spiritually recognized. This shows how important sex is in marriage.

When you look at how aggressive men are towards sex you may think that what a man needs from a woman is sex. Of course, if he has not married you yet or he does not really intend to marry you what he will need from you is nothing above your body. But if he really intends to marry you or if you guys are already married sex is never what he needs from you - maybe let me say it better; "WHAT A MAN NEEDS MOST FROM A WOMAN IS NOT SEX."

Many young girls think because they are sexually active and experience they will easily be married and have their husbands loving them. And when a man approaches for marriage they think the greatest asset they have to show the man is sex. Others also think once they are giving out their bodies it means they are giving out the best for which reason they will be chosen above all.

There is this young girl who is very beautiful and sexually active. Due to that she thought sex is all that matters to a man. Ironically, she struggled for long before finally getting married. Her sexual dexterity could not win her the heart of a man until out of the blue and reason beyond

imagination a very handsome good man married her. The wedding was grand and her tears were now gone. Unfortunately only a year after the wedding the marriage fell on rocks. Within five years three different men came her way but none could stay.

The problem was simple. She thought sex was all that matters so she would never submit. But submission is what men need, not sex. It is time for our young ladies to know that when a man is ready to marry he will not look out for a woman who will satisfy his sex drive but a woman who will submit herself to him. Excuse my language, "every woman has vagina but not every woman has humility." So when you are a humble woman, you are an expensive jewelry. And a man of integrity will fear to lose you.

What does the holy say, "wife, submit to your husband." The reason is that a man's true love goes out only for a woman who is submissive. Your beauty cannot make another woman ugly but your humility can let him love you above all other women.

Sadly, many young ladies in our days call submission as "control." And you will hear them saying in tiny romantic voices, "As for me I don't want any man to control me oh." If you don't want to submit don't think of marriage because no man in his right sense will offer his love to a woman whose heart is higher than his height, no matter how short he may be.

When a woman bows her knee before a man, the man will automatically bow his heart before her love. And love her sincerely. There are, of course, recalcitrant men who will not value women of humility but I tell you that every true man does not need sex, but submission. It is submission that truly makes you a romantic wife. So be the African queen you want to be but when it comes to dealing with your husband, play the role of a humble maid. Don't forget that it is the spirit of humility that has caused many maids to hijack their mistresses' husbands. Be your man's queen and be his maid also.

I wish you all the best as you submit in your relationship and marriage. May God bless you with good marriage, my dear sister.

Is he the RIGHT man for me?

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There is a great need to know how to choose the r...: There is a great need to know how to choose the right man. Doing so will help you live right for the rest of your life hence, the re...

There is a great need to know how to choose the right man. Doing so will help you live right for the rest of your life hence, the reason why this topic cannot be exhausted. To know the right one, you need to ask the right questions to get the right answers. Asking the following questions and answering them sincerely will help you get this right once and for all.

Is he God Fearing?

Before you marry someone, it is crucial you are both in faith. You need to examine his faith life and determine if he truly loves and fears God. If he does, he will definitely treat you right. Check his habits, interests, and behavior. These things often are indicators of his faith in God.

Is he faithful?

One of the things you should consider is if he is faithful to you. Is he a flirt? Is he unreliable? Do you trust each other enough to let go and be open? These are questions you should answer before ascertaining that he is the one for you. If you notice any disturbing behavior from him, it’s time to talk! And then you can make your decisions based on the outcome of the talk. Do not be in a hurry to leave a relationship, likewise don’t stay back when you honestly know in your heart it’s not wise to force the relationship. 

Is he in love with you?

From his actions, can you tell if he loves you or not? If you still cannot tell, its better you wait some more till you are certain of this fact. A man who loves you will be patient with you and not put the pressure of sex on you.  A man who is not crazy about you in courtship will make you crazy in marriage because you will get frustrated. Is he excited about you? Is he proud of you? Does he respect you? A man who doesn’t respect you now will abuse you later. Read between the lines and be sincere with yourself.

Can You Influence him?

From your past dealings and discussions, can you say he listens to you? Does he shut you down when you’re trying to advise him or does he listen to you and take your advice? Despite the fact that a husband is in control of the house, a wife should be able to influence her man. If you discover that he is autocratic in leadership and listens to no one, you may want to analyze your relationship more critically. 

Can he Protect me?

Every woman desires protection and security in her relationship. He must be able to look out for what’s best for you, ensure you are safe and take a stand by you both physically and spiritually. 

Is he abusive?

 How does he react when he is angry? Does he throw things, have temper tantrums or even hit you? There are little signs, you would have been seeing even though it hasn’t resulted into proper abuse, please do not ignore those little signs as they would become bigger issues when you finally marry him. It is better to deal with it early while in a dating/ courting relationship, than when already in marriage. 

How do you have one voice on marital/future issues? 

There are so many things to be agreed upon to avoid conflicts in marriage. Some of such things are: Career, where to worship, In-laws, relationship, Food, Culture, Mode of dressing, Lifestyle, Number of children, Money, etc. Please consider such issues carefully before going into a lifetime Union. 

Are you Sure?

Having considered these and many more, are you sure he is the one for you? Do you still entertain doubts? Do you have peace of mind concerning him? If you don’t, do not ignore that feeling and if you do, I wish you the very best in your years ahead. Cheers! 

by Dabira Magazine